New Years resolutions for the Toronto Blue Jays players and management

Colin Reid
New York Yankees v Toronto Blue Jays
New York Yankees v Toronto Blue Jays / Mark Blinch/GettyImages
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It's New Years Eve, and everyone is out celebrating. Some will be doing some misbehaving before implementing their New Years resolutions.

Blue Jays players and management should make some resolutions, and here are some they should consider.

General manager Ross Atkins resolves to quit being wishy washy and will try to project his true personality if he has one.

Manager John Schneider resolves to bring down the hammer on a few of his very talented boys. Yucking it up will still be allowed, but not to the silly level .

Pitching coach Pete Walker resolves to only work with staff aces. "If they are not going to turn into aces, I'm not going to waste my time." he said.

Third base coach Luis Rivera resolves to make better effort on foul balls. He lets way too many get past him.

New bench coach Don Mattingly resolves to come out of the closet as a CFL fan, as his brother quarterbacked the Saskatchewan Roughriders and was a kicker for the Ticats.

Buck Martinez resolves to keep broadcasting with the Jays.

José Berríos resolves to strike out Javier Baez (his cuñado, or brother in law) even if his sister in law gets crabby.

Alek Manoah resolves to quit picking on guys smaller than him, especially Gerrit Cole.

Tim Mayza resolves to not make any plays that make the fans watching writhe in agony.

Zach Pop and Jordan Romano resolve to say "eh" many times when being interviewed, in order to prove they are Canadian.

Bo Bichette resolves not to tell anyone he has heard of the Edmonton Trappers, where his dad played for three years.

Vladdy resolves to get a glove that baseballs will not go through.

George Springer resolves to learn to count to four.

Kevin Kiermaier resolves to climb the walls better than Spiderman, not being able to fly like our former Superman Kevin Pillar.

Santiago Espinal resolves to be the best versatile middle-infielder in the big leagues, and he will make good on it.

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!

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